Day 4

Working today, 7 am until 7 pm. Not going to be doing a workout…I don’t think. That schedule repeats tomorrow. I work every weekend, so that leaves me free to work out 5 days a week, which will have to do. I keep coming back to the nutrition portion, I know that if I mind my food, eat clean and responsibly that 2 days without working out won’t hurt me. That’s hard to think about sometimes, especially when I can think of three people I know that are less than a size 5 who eat lots of junk. When I really break it down though, they aren’t “healthy.” And they don’t eat junk as a rule, they just definitely don’t eat clean.

There is a lot floating around in my mind right now. About being obese. Ugh, what a horrible word, defined by Merriam-Websters:

OBESE /oʊˈbi:s/ adjective

[more obese; most obese] : very fat : fat in a way that is unhealthy

Synonyms: blubbery, chubby, corpulent, fleshy, full, gross, lardy, fat, overweight, plump, podgy [chiefly British], portly, pudgy, replete, roly-poly, rotund, round, tubby…Ok then tell me how you really feel Mr. Thesaurus.
(And just in case you’re interested, Merriam-Webster also adds this)

Rhymes with OBESE

apiece, at peace, Burmese, camise, caprice, cassis, cerise, chemise, Chinese, Cochise, codpiece, coulisse, crosspiece, decease, decrease, degrease, Dumfries, earpiece, eyepiece, fieldpiece, grandniece, hairpiece, headpiece, heelpiece, increase, lend-lease, Maltese, Matisse, Maurice, mouthpiece, nosepiece, one-piece, pastis, pelisse, police, re-lease, release, seapiece, set piece, shankpiece, showpiece, sidepiece, stringpiece, sublease, surcease, tailpiece, think piece, timepiece, toepiece, three-piece, two-piece, valise, wool grease, workpiece

apiece, at peace, Burmese, camise, caprice, cassis, cerise, chemise, Chinese, Cochise, codpiece, coulisse, crosspiece, decease, decrease, …
Just in case you wanted to make a song out of it or something??
I’m going to use the word obese in this journal, because that is how the medical world and fitness world refer to it. I am going to make myself say it, in hopes that saying it makes me want to fight it. And, if I were being completely honest, morbidly obese is more the description.
My Granny used to have a little fluffy owl animal on her fridge. It was perched on a sign that read, “FAT IS NOT FLATTERING.” Lol, well no, I guess it isn’t, but then skinny aint all that great either:) I have to be careful here. I have a tendency to over-analyze, and then the results of that I break down further, and further, and further, until I drive my self freaking crazy. I need to kind of keep this in perspective, I need to lose weight for my health. I’m good enough, smart enough, and da-gonnit, people like me, Stewart Smalley, God love him. I don’t have a major conflict of character, I mean, I am ok with me, I love me in fact. I know I am a good mother, friend, wife, sister, nurse etc. But, I also know that there are things I could improve on, who couldn’t?! But I am not comfortable, and it’s time. I’d be lying to myself and those of you who read this blog if I said I was completely happy. I don’t know if that’s possible at 80-100 lbs overweight, (depending on what chart you look at.)
I could continue on and on, but I’ll stop here…for now.
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2 thoughts on “Day 4

  1. Good work sister. Love the blog:) Remember – what you eat is 70-80% of the equation. It’s OK not to workout every single day.

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