Unicorns in the Snow

I’ve been complaining all winter that is hasn’t felt like winter. I remember when I was young Missouri always got so much snow. I used to sled in my Granny and Granddads front yard, these days, it doesn’t snow like it used to. 

We’re supposed to get dumped on tomorrow. So much so, that nary a flake has fallen from the sky and school is cancelled. The bread aisle at the local grocery is empty, really, and it’s very, very cold outside. I can’t wait. 

Tomorrow will be a sleeping in, baking cookies, doing laundry, making forts sort of day.

I went to acting class after a two month hiatus today. It was, for lack of a better word, magical. I’m dramatic ok? I didn’t say anything about unicorns. 

I can’t help but feel like all my life I was supposed to do this. I don’t care to be famous or anything like that, but I want to move people with art that I create using my person, my body, my whole self. I want to be vulnerable and feel, I want to convey beautiful stories to others through the medium of acting. I don’t even think I said that right. 

I can remember being asked as a child what I wanted to be, I always answered, “a star.” Somehow I knew that what I saw those people do on television was what I wanted to do. I kept that dream until my youthful rebellion and a bitch of a drama teacher brought me to the conclusion that some dreams must die. 

But it didn’t, and it hasn’t, and it won’t. This, at thirty-nine years old is not my last attempt at stardom, it is me doing something I have longed for. I don’t know what will come of it, but for now, I will listen to my coach and try to be vulnerable and live in the precious moments that have been afforded me. 

And God…thanks for the snow.

The Dream Crusher & The Latin Rock Band that Made it all Better

Lots on my mind tonight. First of all I have to confess something. I made cookies yesterday, just enough for the kids and thier friends to each have one of my homeade buckaroos. It’s my grandmother’s recipe, cocnut, chocolate chips, oatmeal, and I add some coarsely chopped almonds, yum. There was one that happened to be left over, I tried to get my friend to eat it and she declined. So there it sat, all day log, alone, on the cold glass stovetop.

Later, I came home from dinner and a movie with my family, and there it sat, still alone, rejected… scrumptious. So I took it, into my hand and gave it a home, in my tummy, with all the other bad food from the night. Later, I invited acai dark chocolate berries to the party. It wasn’t a good feeling, to go to bed full. I am getting used to going to bed hungryish. Breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a pauper. I am still having trouble with the big breakfast thing. I would rather do meals this way; price, king, pauper.

I went on a ride to the community center tonight, ready to swim some laps and ride home. My brick workout, where you stack two types of exercises from the tri. Being the newb that I am I forgot a lock for my bike and the silver headed rule follower working the front desk was under no circumstances going to let me bring my bike in. I all but begged, but no, said she didn’t want to be yelled at being new and all. That, and I suspect it gave her great pleasure to crush my dreams. Why do some people roll like that? I pictured her later that night eating her pot pie watching wheel of fortune feeling quite satisfied with herself, as if she’d done some great favor to the universe.

I ended up riding twenty miles and loving it! Tomorrow I will try to swim and run, but the best part about tonight was my new clip-less pedals and shoes. It felt a little like wearing tap shoes and bike riding but it was great! I don’t know if it was the coffee, or the shakeology I mixed with it, or maybe even the shoes but my ride was phenom. The hills were cake, I had no problems with them. I’ve been told that the shoes would help on hills and they must have, it was an entire different riding experience. Kudos to they guys at Epic bike and sport in near Parkville, Mo. Those guys are certifiably the best crew and bike shop I’ve been in so far. Which is why I pass two other bike shops and go all the way over there from Liberty to shop them. Service, it still works.

So I rode and rode and could have ridden another ten easily. I made myself go home because it was getting dark. Oye Como Va, the Santana rendition not the Tito Puente version, is now my official last song of the ride, it’s perfect. I’ve fallen in love with cycling.